"I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me." -Jesus Matthew 25:26
I recently read a quote by Ben Stein, "I am not much but I am all I think about." Then I remembered the people who have cared for me through this illness. My husband who stayed with me night after night in the hospital and lifted me out of bed when I needed it only to get up in the morning and go back to work. My mother who crocheted a wardrobe of amazing hats, sat with me day after day watching the Food Networks and drove me to hassle with doctors and pharmacists. My daughter who washed my face and cut my hair tenderly with great smelling products. My son who dutifully watched the clock for my medicine and brought me ice chips. I had friends who visited (and some who didn't), friends who called and sent cards and food. People who prayed that didn't even know me.
The truth is that care-giving is not limited to even one of these things. It is act of giving care even from afar. I have had people tell me, "I just didn't call because I didn't know what to say" or "I knew some one who recently died and just couldn't deal with you being sick" or "I just can't handle hospitals." You know what I say to that? GET OVER YOURSELF! This is about the sick person and not you. You know what I would have rather heard, "I am having a really hard time with this but I am calling to say I am thinking about you." If you have a hard time talking, then send a card. If you have a hard time with hospitals, then call the room. You know, who the heck likes hospitals anyway?! Why do people say this? Who goes there on a joy ride? "Hey, I got nothing to do, let's go check out the hospital!" My mom is having knee surgery next week. Am I looking forward to it? No, but you just try and keep me out.
People say that I inspire them but you know who inspires me? The friend who I hardly knew who called me EVERY day just to say hi and check in. Some days I couldn't answer the phone and just laid there and smiled at the answering machine. The friend who brought over home-made mac n cheese in a crazy wig so I didn't feel so bad. The friend who commented on every single Facebook update to encourage me. People across the states and close to home who prayed faithfully for me (some who never met me) and introduced themselves later with a smile. The older couple who checked in and came to be with me when I needed them. My boss who kept my job for me and keeps my position flexible.
Don't you know that you can be one of these inspirations? I want to follow their example. I have a good friend right now who is fighting pancreatic cancer. I am doing my best to be there and be a comforting presence for her. The caregivers are the true heroes. They push themselves aside and get to work. They push their sleeves up and get in there. They take a chance at being uncomfortable, messy, tired, upset, and generally having to deal with someone who quite frankly is not them self and may be unpleasant as well. I know that pretty much described me. I was too busy fighting to survive and couldn't always give a high five. I cried and complained. Sometimes I was a real pain in the butt.
I thank God for my caregivers and the fact that they hung in there with me all the way. I only hope that someday people will say about me, that I was one of the ones who really cared. How about you?
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